Another one disappears
Once again I meet my fears
I throw another down and I’m by myself
You think that I am hurt inside
You think that I would fight and cry
You’re wrong but that’s ok,
so does everyone else
I’m not lying when I say
that with you I'd be ok
it’s the loneliness that crushes me down
look at what I’ve sacrificed
Paid in full the highest price
You’re the only one I want around
and sure sometimes I get what I want
but the question is if it matters or not
all this shit I got, doesn’t fill the spot of you
my shitty habits fuck up my life
these voices keep me up at night
my dreams are when I’m happiest, it’s sad but true
cause in my dreams I have my health
you’re by my side, my family’s well
so I keep my eyes closed shut, as long as I can
cause even just the thought of you
is better than what I wake up to
but that’s ok I don’t expect you to understand

I don’t expect you to understand

but will the pain and anger stop?
I’ve never did believe in god
and I don’t know if I ever can
One day I might change my mind
one day when the sun starts to shine
one day ill know myself like the back of my hand
stay in my room, trapped in my thoughts
singing stories, playing plots
heavy clouds surround my songs at night
I’d trade my talents to have your time
money doesnt fuel my rhyme
people make love, but people also fight
stories written in the sand
your presence slipping from my hands
I lost you once, I just can’t lose you again
I think thats why it hurts me so
Not because you had to go
But cause I was your and you were my best friend
It’s crazy 7 years have passed
I’m sorry that I was such an ass
I’m sorry for all those things I wrote online
I’m really sorry about that night
that I threatened my self with that knife
I’m sorry that I lied and told you, I’d be fine
I really wish that I could take back
The years I treated you like trash
I’m sorry I dragged it on for so damn long
I should have let you live your life
I should have gone away that night
I’m sorry that I wrote all of those songs
You’re a good person, I am not
I’m more fucked up than I thought
I fucking hate my self for hating you
But I guess that I should wrap this up
A Nitrous Gas Intake Erupts
I’m sorry for the shit I put you through.